Fran Light and her two children, Desarae and Mark, spoke in Phil Miller’s Intro to Human Services class. They were guest speakers for the class’s weeklong study on resilience.
“I had a mostly normal growing up,” Light said. “I didn’t party cause my grandparents were so strict.”
Light grew up in Jacksonville, Fla. with her grandparents. She would occasionally see her mother and never knew her father.
“I ran away with the first boy I fell in love with,” Light said. “I left my family behind and moved to Georgia.”
When she was 17 years old, Light had her first child, Desarae. She was thrilled, but her financial and domestic situations became a nightmare.
“We lived in a one room cabin in the woods,” Light said. “Some days we would live off of the land and eat squirrel.”
She remembers stealing food from her children’s elementary school.
“I regret it,” she said, “but it was between that and starving.”
Other necessities became a constant struggle to have. One example: toilette paper.
“We used to use recycled magazine to wipe,” Light said. “I got a real bad infection.”
But the man she once loved became her biggest trouble.
“My husband was always strung out on drugs,” she said. “He would sometimes come home high and beat me.”
The children were also greatly affected by his behavior.
“There was a lot of abuse,” Desarae said. “But we won’t go into detail because it’s private.”
Light told the class that Mark’s (Jr.) fingers were bent out of shape because her husband intentionally slammed them in a window.
“It came to the point it was too much,” Light said. “We had to get out.”
Light and her two children came to Burlington, N.C. in 2000. She soon found a job through Aramark and began working at Elon University. She currently serves at Boar’s Head Deli.
“I love working at Elon,” Light said. “I love the people at Elon.”
Last year, the family decided to go back and visit their family back in Georgia. Mark had not changed: still with little money and constantly using drugs.
“I found out he had a love child with a woman prior to our marriage,” Light said. “I always suspected it.”
The troubles that this man caused are many, but he is still loved. He will move to Burlington at the beginning of next year and work for Desarae’s fiancée, an auto-mechanic. Desarae and Mark, Jr. had the idea for him to move.
“I never had a daddy,” Desarae said. “I still want my daddy.”
Light, who was remarried in 2003, said she is a bit worried about the move but still supportive.
“If [Mark] still doesn’t change after he moves here he’ll have to find his way back to Georgia.”
The last decade in North Carolina has given the family time to forgive.
“I won’t forget the things he’s done to us,” Light said. “But I will always love him.”
